I was talking to a lady today who is the parent of a wonderful son who is funny and happy and loves dinosaurs (just like my youngest). My heart aches for her though as her son has Autism like my girls, but she can only focus on the bad and that is all she talks about. I wish I could help her see positive and she said to me today that my children are obviously not as Autistic as her son because we do lots of things and I am a pretty positive person.
I learnt over time though that if im not at least seeming positive the whole family feed off of the negativity and thats chaos!! I do hear a lot though from different people that their child is more Special needs because they have a chair or cant use the toilet or…well you get the picture. I tend to stay away from forums just because of it now. I am lucky as we dont face many of the problems we used to. My girls are able to use the toilet and they can walk and im so grateful for the blessings. But it has been hard work and persistance. And my eldest is 16 next year so we have had many years to learn together.
We still face a lot. Puberty and the fact they often refuse the sanitary items, today Jessie was home from school as I could see she was ill but they dont feel pain or illness, the sensory problems we still deal with, the fact I can never socialise in the evenings…I could go on and on but I like to say we can eat together now that ive learnt what everyone likes, I can see problems that may cause anxiety so can help, we visit lots of places but I research them so we plan before we go with lots of visual and life really is pretty much liveable these days! We have a great community and church which helps but we do ok.
And it isnt a competition to see who suffers the most, everyone has hardships.
I just wish I could help people who feel so much despair because believe me, I’ve been there.
And we need to stick together and help each other. It can be lonely enoigh without beingvin competition.